Tuesday, January 15, 2013

My New Angry Tommy Lee Jones Meme with Haiku's!

I just created this meme and I thought I would make some haiku's to go along with it. I hope you enjoy!

                                     Seasonal Affective Disorder by Matt Simons

                                                       Why so sad Tommy?
                                                       You abolished slavery.
                                                       With large golden globes.

                     That's not Funny Will Farrel and Girl From Bridesmaides by Matt Simons

                                                         Why the frown Tommy?
                                                         Not a fan of dry humor, huh?
                                                         Ahhh right, Kristen Wig.

                                      No Smiling For Old Men by Matt Simons
                                                     Why is Tommy sad?
                                                     No Globe for old Thaddeus.
                                                     Grumpy cat lives.

                                         CHEER UP TOMMY LEE JONES!!!                    


Sunday, January 6, 2013

Have you been on Rain Wilson's Soul Pancake?

My second question:

Have you met the Kid President yet?

Did I mention I love to Yelp?

                                      (Heidi playing Punch Out at Headquarters Beercade)

So given certain circumstances, I sometimes like to tell the world about my restaurant experiences on Yelp. I have heard all of the negative things everyone has has to say about Yelp and frankly I don't care. I love Yelp and I use it as a guide to find out where I want to go and sometimes even what to avoid.

As a matter of fact, you can find an amazing electrician named Howard Simons on Yelp. Go ahead and Google him, I dare you.

Take a gander at my two most recent reviews from my trip to Skyline Chili in Kentucky as well as my trip down memory lane to Headquarters Beercade (Click on the link to see my full reviews):

Headquarters Beercade

"When someone tells me lets go to an adult arcade I sort wonder what I am getting myself into. I mean I like porn but usually in the comfort of my own home." 

Skyline Chili-Hebron, Kentucky
"Wow, the first person to write a review for this classy establishment gave it one star! Um I think you may be confused. 1 star is really bad and I think you meant to give it 5 stars. I say this because I went into this experience with the proper expectations and I left extremely satisfied." 

What is Grey Matter?

                                                  (My girlfriend Heidi and I in Nashville)

Wikipedia describes Grey Matter as the following:

GREY MATTER is made up of neuronal cell bodies. The grey matter includes regions of the brain involved in muscle control, sensory perception such as seeing and hearing, memory, emotions, and speech.

This blog is not about the technicalities of Grey Matter (because I have no clue of what those are) but it is about what stimulates my senses. In a city like Chicago there are many things that stimulate my senses. Thankfully, unlike many other cities, Chicago isn't that stinky. As a matter of fact, when you are driving down Ohio Street and entering downtown Chicago you can sometimes even smell a cookie factory.

As long as your eyes are open, you will see things unlike anything you have ever experienced while walking down the urban sprawl that is the Windy City. My most recent trip to the Art Institute is a perfect example of that.

Chicago is home to me so it evokes many emotions and memories. From eating my favorite deep dish pizza (Lou Malnati's) or to visiting a place that makes me nostalgic (Headquarters Beercade), I will tell those stories and provide you with reviews from all of those places. But don't worry, this isn't Pleasantvile or The Truman Show.

Sometimes I will feel the need to get out of town and tell you about those adventures as well. Coming up soon is my trip to the Fancy Foods Expo in San Francisco, California. I am going to walk that show for my work as an Account Executive for the National Restaurant Association's Restaurant, Hotel-Motel Trade Show and the International Wine, Spirits and Beer Event.

I walk competitive trade shows all over the country to find new prospective companies that would have interest in selling their products or services to restaurant owners. In the past this has taken me to New York City and Anaheim. In 2013, I will also be visiting Washington, DC and Las Vegas, Nevada. The trade shows provide me with an overwhelming amount of things to taste, see, and feel. What are those things? You will just need to wait and find out.

Please don't hesitate to send me suggestions on places to check out here in Chicago or in any of the cities I am visiting. I look forward to hearing from you!